What Is Anxiety and What Does Anxiety Feel Like: A Quick Guide
What is Anxiety? Keep reading to get a quick guide about: what anxiety really is (with an example), how frequently it occurs, what are some common signs/ indicators, and when is the point where we should stop and evaluate.
What is anxiety?
Anxiety is the feeling of apprehension, that we, as people, have any time we have something we need to face, and haven’t faced it yet.
Anxiety is the feeling of apprehension, that we, as people, have any time we have something we need to face, and haven’t faced it yet. This is a very common experience. Especially considering that many of us are searching for our true selves. That place of centeredness. What do I mean by that? Well, there are many voices in the world that give us instruction, and ultimately provide scripts about what we should and shouldn’t do. You know those voices! Society. Parents. Culture. Etcetera. The list goes on. Although these entities may be well-meaning, their expectations box us in. They dissociate the uniqueness from the soul for the convenience and ease of simplifying individuals into categories. For the comfort of surmising. – Mis-applying a broad stroke to the beauty of detailed vastness… People are left with a small space to live in. (Similar to that of a postage stamp, I envision.) If you come outside of the script, you are met, unfortunately with condemnation. Let me give you an example…
…there are many voices in the world that give us instruction, and ultimately provide scripts about what we should and shouldn’t do… They dissociate the uniqueness from the soul…
Society says you have to have more, more, and then more. The right car. The right degree (coming from the right university). You have to live in the right neighborhood. Be friends with the right people. Get married (deny any gender or sexuality difference, mind you) at the right time. And have kids at the right age. With a job that has status, earning you superfluous amounts of money you show it off (but in a “gracious, non-offensive way”), by buying others things (false gratitude), and buying things you don’t need or can’t afford to impress others; all to continually prove you’ve checked all the boxes that I described above. To justify your value.
This is a HARD SCRIPT TO FOLLOW. Yet, many of us, through no fault of our own, have internalized messages like these, and live life by these rules. And are constantly chasing the allure of the moment, yet the feeling is fleeting and temporary at best. This script engages coping using comparison (comparing self to others) as a main strategy to navigate the ever-fluctuating value of self (since one’s value is determined by materialism and accumulation, not the wonder and essence of the Soul). — As you can see, this process disconnects the person from the true self. In that, there are many issues one would have to face. Ergo, anxiety.
Many of us, through no fault of our own, have internalized messages like these, and live life by these rules.
Now, human beings are wonderful. Our natural state is that of a healthy, whole self. Saying this, anytime we ignore something that needs attention, the knock gets louder. The same is true for anxiety. When we start to feel insurmountable levels of apprehension, ourselves are telling us, “Stop what you are doing, please. Please address this.” Sometimes we may not know how to go about it, but the urge to work towards a solution; to ease the tension, is there.
Human beings are wonderful. Our natural state is that of a healthy, whole self.
When we start to feel insurmountable levels of apprehension, ourselves are telling us, “Please address this.”
Many of us heed the impulse. However, because humans dislike pain; people are prone to find the easiest, most efficient way to ease stress. Now easy is relative. Easy depends on a person’s experience, what they are accustomed to, and what templates (internally) and habits are already pre-existing for that particular person. However, these means are temporary because addressing the issues we do not want to face is hard. – It’s hard to completely let down your defensive mechanisms, be vulnerable, in order to be real; to fully and thoroughly address the issue. Because of that, there is an interplay of experiencing stress, using a temporary means to superficially decrease stress, then experiencing more stress (because the real problem has not been faced), and feeling more compelled to use the temporary release lever again (the avoidance cycle, see image below). In this repeated cycle that augments anxiety and generalizes fear – We end up developing beliefs that are adverse to healing, validate temporary enabling coping, and we attune our focus to danger (in an effort to stay safe). This selective focus on danger, lack, or scarcity attracts the subjective experiences of the same (as situations are processed through this lens, even situations where a threat is not present). Because real means of addressing the situation have not yet occurred, people often find themselves experiencing failure which has further complications for one’s belief in oneself to be able to heal, really address the issue, to get things done (self-efficacy), and their self-esteem.
It’s hard to completely let down your defensive mechanisms, be vulnerable, in order to be real; to fully and thoroughly address the issue.
The Avoidance Cycle, which perpetuates anxiety.
So you see, anxiety can vary in intensity. Regardless, there is no judgement of where a person is at. Some symptoms of anxiety are: restlessness, excessive worry, mind-body symptoms stemming from being in a frequent worried state (i.e., stomach aches, difficulty sleeping, struggles with concentration, muscle tension), and difficulty controlling worry.
Some symptoms of anxiety are: restlessness, excessive worry, mind-body symptoms stemming from being in a frequent worried state (i.e., stomach aches, difficulty sleeping, struggles with concentration, muscle tension), and difficulty controlling worry.
There are other signs of anxiety that are more particular to an experience (i.e., panic attacks, social anxiety), so the list above is not inclusive but gives you a general premise. One can also see the outworkings of internalized anxious beliefs in one’s life, which vary from person to person (i.e., shallow relationships).
If you feel that worry is getting in the way of daily life (healthy eating, sleeping, creativity, productivity & relationships), I encourage you to think about mindfully working on what issues you may need to face in a way that is safe, validating (to your whole self), and can move you forward. The walk towards health, in terms of anxiety, is riding the wave of a high amount of distress (because avoidance coping isn’t being used, and what’s bothering us really matters – because we matter), and working towards a long-term solution which takes time, but ultimately leads to an actual abatement of worry. – For some that’s therapy, for others that’s life coaching, for others it’s taking the personal work more seriously; but I ask we all listen to our sacred temples, ourselves. And be real. Even though it can be challenging at times. We’re all worth it.
If you feel that worry is getting in the way of daily life (healthy eating, sleeping, creativity, productivity & relationships), I encourage you to think about mindfully working on what issues you may need to face in a way that is safe, validating (to your whole self), and can move you forward.